If You’re Not…
Breaking Bread
If you’re not hearing voices in the cafeteria, you may have a problem.
I thought I would start this blog off with an issue that recently came to my attention. My children (kindergarten and 4th grade) attend public school in Michigan. My kindergartener told me that the principal came into the café. He had a microphone. He told the kindergarteners that the 5th graders had to start eating lunch in their classrooms because they were too loud in the café at lunch time. There were no more details, but I have questions.
Were the 5th graders throwing food, fighting, turning tables over, chanting with a mob-like mentality, or were they talking? The sound of two or three 5th grade classes talking in the cafeteria would be very loud. If you have heard even one 5th grader talk, you know what I mean. Eleven and 12-year-olds are notoriously loud and enthusiastic human beings. Now, if they were throwing food, fighting, and turning tables over, I can understand taking measures to get control over the situation. In the news just last night there was as story of a high school in Detroit closing after lunch and will not be open again today. Why? Because there was a fight of some kind in the cafeteria that was possibly gang related, or so the news reports. Again, details on loud cafeterias are scarce these days.
Was something similar happening at my sons’ school? Maybe, but maybe not.
This conversation prompted me to think about my expectations for mealtime. My expectations are simple. Have a seat, do your best to have good table manners, eat as much as fills you, ask to be excused when you are done, and clear your plate. Wait, there is something missing. My first expectation is to “break bread” with me at the table. What does this mean? Where did it come from? To break bread is to dine together and its history goes back beyond biblical times. When we break bread, we are together. We are having a shared experience. To break bread transcends the physical activity of eating. We are talking, communicating, laughing, and we are sharing with one another. I want to know the best thing about your day. And the worst. You don’t like the potatoes I made? Tell me why and I’ll try another recipe next time. What scared you today? What did you conquer today? Are 5th graders talking about these things? Probably not. But they are having a shared experience over food. This is important. Why?
Think to the holidays. Many holidays are food oriented, or perhaps there is a feast after some fasting. The only time our Thanksgiving table is quiet is during the first few minutes when everyone dives into their favorite item on an overstuffed plate. After that the conversation begins. A child needs to use the restroom. Someone forgot to wash their hands. Someone else already needs seconds. Oops, we forgot the gravy, someone go fetch it. It’s not quiet. It’s not still. There is talking, laughter, and movement.
The best professor of education I ever had told my cohort a wonderful story about the power of breaking bread. I think of it often. When she had to present her doctoral thesis in the 1960s the power went out at the university. She was still expected to present to a room full of professors, regardless of whether they could see her or not. They knew the power would not return for hours but they had a schedule to keep. What did she do? She adapted. She overcame. She made sure every window shade was open to let in whatever light was available. She opened windows so the room could have some circulating air. But the most important thing she did was this. She brought in a feast that no one could have expected. She had her family and friends help her create a meal that could be shared with all the professors that were to be judging her work that afternoon. She knew that food brings people together. She knew that if all these people had a shared experience during her presentation that at the very least, she would be memorable. And she was. Her thesis passed with flying colors and her idea to “break bread” made a stressful experience a positive one for all involved.
Break bread. It’s so much more than eating food. It is a shared experience. Let your students break bread. Let them talk and share with one another in the cafeteria. It will be loud. I know the union provides you with a lunch break, but you have a choice. Why not break bread with your students and engage them in conversation during the meal? Why not try adding something into the cafeteria instead of taking something out? Why else is it important to break bread? Only 30% of families eat dinner together. Read that again. It’s a scientifically based fact that children benefit from family mealtime. Are your students not your family? When you spend 8 hours a day with someone, I think we all certainly hope a familial atmosphere develops.
Some people think a school’s job is only academic and that the family should do everything else. I respect that opinion and I wholeheartedly disagree. Break bread with a cafeteria full of 5th graders. What you’ll hear isn’t simply noise. You’ll hear a shared experience. And what you’ll learn will make you a better teacher.
The link below will take you to an expert in family dinner time.
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